Monday, October 20, 2008

Gutfeld addresses one of the curiously underreported Obama lines from the last debate

One of the reasons I thought McCain kicked butt at the debate was that Obama tossed off so many falsehoods and whines that I thought Fox News, at the very least, as the target of one particularly egregious whine, would call him on it. But noooo! There was Britt Hume going on about Joe the Plumber and Bill Kristol comporting himself as if he were at a wake. Thankfully, though, there is still Greg Gutfeld:

So Obama thinks that Fox News has cost him a few points in the polls – even saying that if he watched the network, he wouldn`t vote for himself either. Now, I`m not here to say Obama`s wrong. I actually think Fox News does go after him – a lot. But someone has to.

For the past three decades, every network has been uniformly the same: heart-bleedingly liberal. Nearly every damn magazine, newspaper and after school special spits out the same left wing assumptions – rich people bad, poor people good, America evil – as though they are suffering from a Marxist version of Tourette`s. And Obama is everything they want in a nice, neat package.

That's why today every anchor wants to crawl into bed with Barack, as every coddled pop singer offers their services for free to the Messiah. And there`s the late night comedians, who hammer Republicans seven times more often than Dems. It`s a golden rule: It doesn`t have to be funny if it`s easy.

But despite all this, you still have people whining in their soiled diapers about Fox News – just because it`s the one news network that refuses to comply with an overarching liberal theocracy. You`ve got celebrity cretins like Tim Robbins, watchdog weenies like Media Matters and crybaby cranks like Keith Olbermann getting worked up to the point of seizure – because we make them uncomfortable. I say to all of you: Stop being a bunch of pussies and be happy you pretty much own the airwaves.

And as for you Obama, stop acting like a kid who complains to the principal because a teacher gave you a 98 instead of a perfect grade. Be thrilled with having the entire media - except us - in the tank for you. Seriously, you don't need blind obedience among everyone with a laminated I.D to win.

So Obama, if you`re expecting people here to kiss your ass, you`ll need to head over to MSNBC. I hear there`s a guy over there with a thrill up his leg dying to give you a sponge bath.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.

No comments: